When life gives a hard slapping back at you (Part 1)

10 August 2011

I was briskly walking away around my school, after a short puff with my friends at our favorite spot. Looking at my watch, it shows another five minutes to eleven. I can hear my class was already engulfed in chaos.

11.00 ~ 11.30 am

I was teaching as usual in my class. But something was amiss. I don’t feel like my usual self. My chest was heavy, I was virtually panting for air, my forehead was covered with cold sweat..

A few moments later, I was feeling upside down. My heart feels like bursting out of my rib cages, as I was engulfed in a series of uncontrollable palpitations and chest discomfort. Yet, I stood in front of my children, teaching them about Weather, the topic of my lesson.

11.30am ~ 12.10 pm

I cut my class ten minutes short. Something was not right. My heart kept missing a beat or two. I went to the staffroom. My HM was sitting down chatting with the other teachers. My bud Jamidi was typing something on his laptop while my friends continued their chat, easing the afternoon away.

“What is this? Darn, I can’t put my fingers on how I feel now” I said to myself. I am a bit worried now. I am going through something that I have never felt before. I took a sip of water, and went to the loo.

And that is when I felt life slapped me the hardest for the first time…

I feel like fainting, everything turns kinda blurry, and my breathing was shallow. It was as if I have lost sense of my body. Something is really BAD happening right here, right now.

I went to the staffroom, fetched my keys and asked Jamidi to send me to the Clinic..

My HM was puzzled, the other teachers seems so concerned, and I was virtually fighting to stay alive.

Jamidi saw me swirling down into confusion, so he pulled me as fast as he could into the car and rushed me to the Clinic.

It took only 6 minutes but it felt like the longest journey in my life…

:: Klinik Kesihatan Apin-Apin ::

I only managed to talk briefly to the medical officer attending me. I was confused, drenched with intolerable anxiety and was obviously looking ‘like hell’. He took my Blood Pressure.

It read 230/190

… the outlook is not good… since I have quite an in depth knowledge in medical science, that BP reading was not good at all…

… and way beyond normal for someone my age….

Then, the MO asked me to remove my belt, my watch, everything metallic from my clothing.

I was hooked onto an ECG machine.

The MO’s face changed after the third ECG reading. Jamidi was in silence, comforting me to ‘be patient and relax’…

I couldn’t. I simply can’t. I felt the urge to ask the MO was happening, but my mouth was shut tight.

I knew something bad had happened.

“ What happened, what does the ECG says?” I asked the MO.

'” To be honest with you Cikgu, the ECG looked bad. We’re dispatching an ambulance to send you to the hospital, as soon as possible.”

‘ After a long pause. I fervently asked again. ’How bad?’

‘ Bad, I can’t say anything as of yet, but it doesn’t look good…..’ he replied. ‘And to top things off, your body seems not responding to the Nifedipine I gave you. As a result, your BP is still at a dangerous level”.

That was enough to silence me. I was asked to rest. But could I? There I was lying in the clinic, with the uncertainty of living through this life and that hell I was undergoing, and the possibility of ending up dead, at the brisk age of 31, from a disease known only to manifest much older people.

I called mom…

She did not pick up her phone.

I called my brother and sister….

Alas, No one at the end of the line.

I called dad.

He answered my call. I nearly broke into tears upon hearing his voice. But I kept my cool, and told him of my situation. I sensed him worrying, so I told him I’ll be fine. I asked him to call my sister and mom, to inform them of my situation, and I told him I’ll be ferried out to the hospital by ambulance. Before hanging up the line, he told me

“..Not to worry Byn, my prayers are with you…’

I turned my face away from Jamidi, and silently wept, as I hung up the phone…

To be continued.